to flow: to be plentiful

Hartebeespoort Dam is not far from where we live. On the one side of the dam wall is a placid reservoir with stunning houses perched on its shores, and all sorts of boats traversing its waters. On the other side is a steep, rocky slope and a riverbed hewn from the rocks. Some weekends we take a trip to the reservoir in order to drive across the dam wall. Cars are sometimes backed up for kilometers waiting for their chance to cross the wall in hopes that the flood gates are open. It is a quite a sight to see the water bursting forth in a magnificent, gushing stream, over the rocks and down the hill.

Daleen and I desire for our lives to flow out of us in much the same way. We want our lives to burst forth from the overflow of our “inner reservoir,” not to dribble forth like cream into coffee. One of our greatest joys is to pour ourselves into others. We love to be agents of healing, helping others to see who they are in Christ and who He has created them to be.

Upon our return to South Africa last month, Daleen and I found ourselves immediately easing into the roles of mentor or “soul friend” with many of those who live around us. We have the privilege of pouring our lives into people who live in our suburb, young leaders, local church leaders, former apprentices and co-workers. Some of these relationships take place over a cup of coffee while others take place in a more formal setting.

to flow: to pour forth

One of my long-term mentoring relationships is with Christo, a 46-year-old mechanic. Christo has been servicing cars for NieuCommunities for the past six years. When I met him, he was a “young” Christ-follower, who was hungry to grow. Although Christo and his wife, Petro, ran their own business, their passion was to bless others through their business by giving of their time, energy and money.

Three years ago, I began meeting weekly with Christo on Friday mornings. By this time, his family had already become a permanent fixture at our Sunday afternoon barbecue and worship time. The highlight of our times together is the ease at which we share our hearts, and how we encourage each other through our challenges. As we've met over the past three years, it has been a delight to hear of his inner transformation, as well as his continuing desire to work more closely with CRM.

During the course of last year, I got Christo and Petro connected with Enterprise International. The result is Christo's Cars, which buys slightly damaged or repossessed cars, fixes them and sells them at a good price. Enterprise International is a division of CRM that mobilizes business people who are compelled to serve the Kingdom by developing and managing businesses that fund ministries (for more information go to www.enterpriseinternational.org).

I have enjoyed seeing both Christo and Petro come alive as they identify their gifting, find their niche and live more “on mission.” My hope is that they will make a success of Christo's Cars and continue this kind of work far into the future. It is a pleasure to walk with others as they get a tighter sense of God's calling on their lives, and begin to live out of their true selves.

women are like tea bags

There is a saying that women are like tea bags, you don't no how strong they are until you dunk them in hot water.

Recently, a well-known South African Christian singer's wife was raped. The other day, I was speaking to a friend of mine and she told me of this woman's response to this ordeal. Although the woman is waiting to find out if she is pregnant, and whether or not she has AIDS, she is praising God. She feels that God had asked her, "who will stand in the gap for my name?" and she said that she would. She feels as though God has now called on her. She feels that although her body was used, her soul was not touched and her heart was not stolen away from God.

Not knowing what kind of tea bag I will make, I marvel at her strength and unwavering love for God. I have been angry at God for far less. I have felt let down and disappointed by Him. And, although I have know my share of misfortune, I have not really tasted true sacrifice for God. I can honestly say that I would not wish to be called to stand in the gap if the gap looks like that, but maybe I could handle a crack.

I wonder if my fear keeps me from knowing true faith? I wonder if I have gotten so comfortable with my life that I don't want to be one of God's warriors anymore? I wonder if a stolen car is as much of a sacrifice as I am willing to make (someone tried to steal our car last week). I believe we all have different burdens to carry and not all of them are a call to tragedy. But if mine was, I hope I am made of stronger stuff than I think, and that it will not destroy my faith in God.

Daleen

Intentional Missional Community

Daleen and I often say that we desire to live in an intentional, missional community. In my recent solitude times with God, I have been thinking through just what I mean when I say the words intentional, missional and community. Actually, I don't like to separate them because they flow so very well together. Here are some of my desires for living in such a community:

• sharing meals together on a regular basis
• having authentic relationships - sharing and enjoying life together
• sharpening one another - could be a mentoring relationship or just doing life together
• learning, worshipping and praying together
  
• growing deeper - with one another, individually with God and corporately with God
• living out Kingdom values with one another and with those who live around us
• hospitality - being a welcoming haven for one another and for those who live around us
  
• facing conflict and working through conflict
• seamless, missional living in the daily places in which we find ourselves (basically living "on mission" wherever we are out of our true selves)

A couple of days ago, I was reading Romans 12. As I read the chapter I felt like it was a great commentary on intentional, missional community. Here are some highlights from Romans 12:9-21:

• be devoted to one another in brotherly love
• honor one another above yourself
• serve the Lord
• be joyful in hope, patient in affliction and faithful in prayer
• share with God's people who are in need
• practice hospitality
• bless those who persecute you
• rejoice with those who rejoice, mourn with those who mourn
• live in harmony with one another
• associate with people of low position
• do not repay evil for evil and do not take revenge
• as much as it depends on you, live at peace with one another

Striving for such a life is not always easy, but I believe it is the life we are called to as the Church. And, although not easy, it is in such a community of people where we will truly be transformed, and thus the world around us will also be transformed. Because of this, Daleen and I feel called to not only participate in intentional, missional communities of faith, but to also help birth them wherever we go.

Active Waiting

This morning I was sitting on my couch, fixated on one of our trees in our yard. I realized that in the 7 years of living in our house, this particular tree has grown tremendously. Of course, it was a small tree when we moved in, so perhaps it is easier to notice the growth. And, although I know that the tree is constantly growing, I just don't think about it that much. I trust the truth of what I know - trees grow.

So, back to my couch.

There I sat, thinking about the future of my family and our transition to whatever is next. Somehow my mind made the connection that waiting on God is a lot like watching a tree grow. Sometimes it just doesn't seem like there's a whole lot going on. Day in and day out I don't necessarily gain clarity or have an "ah-ha" moment. Quite frankly, it is easy to wonder if anything is happening at all.

But I know the truth, and I trust the process. There is more going on here than I can think or imagine. God is doing things that I cannot see. Some of which is happening in my own heart, the heart of Daleen and my children's hearts.

So, I wait. I wait on Him even while I actively live in the moment with all that God has called me to today. I wait and draw close to His heart so that my heart will be ready to respond when He shows the way forward.

Finishing Well

It's difficult to explain the significance of saying a proper “good-bye” when one is in a period of transition. Saying good-bye to what was is as significant as saying hello to what will be, but we often forget this as me move into the future and what is next.

In October of this year, our family was celebrated by our community in grand fashion as we prepare for the future. First of all, we were treated to a wonderful dinner with just our staff team and our NieuCommunities' director, Rob Yackley. As we enjoyed our meal, words of encouragement and love, healing and hope, were spoken into our lives. What a blessing.

After enjoying our meal we made our way back to Pangani to join our wider community of apprentices and friends. When we arrived we found that the entire place had been transformed into an art gallery. But this was no ordinary art gallery. This art gallery featured pictures of remembering, letters from past apprentices that we had coached, messages from friends, as well as art that Daleen and I had done over the past 7 years. It was overwhelming in the best of ways – almost too much for a heart to take in.

There was more food, fun and a “show” featuring the talents of our local friends. There was a community prayer for our family. There was thanksgiving.

Again, it is hard to put into words what an evening like this will do for the soul. It heals, it brings closure, it releases. We are grateful for being part of an intentional community of people. It is something we will look for wherever we go.

Change

December 2009

Change is a natural part of life. Without change I suppose I'd still be hitting my wife over the head with a club and dragging her off to my cave. Change is good. This year has been filled with a lot of change, and the next year promises to be filled with even more.

When Daleen and I were called to serve with NieuCommunities in South Africa we didn't know just how long we'd be here. Our calling was the strongest we'd ever sensed, and the most specific as well. We were not about to leave NieuCommunities until we were confident that God was leading us that way.

to change : to modify

This year it became clear that NieuCommunities South Africa was on a journey of its own. What we had created over the past seven years was good, and it was affecting deep change in our apprentices' lives, but it was not sustainable. It was evident that our staff was becoming less missional, and our apprenticeship was becoming more programmatic. It was obvious to our staff that it was time to go back to the drawing board, learn from our experience, and modify our course.

When I mention making some modifications, I am not talking about small changes. Rather, NieuCommunities is revamping how they will apprentice young leaders, as well as who they will be apprenticing. The team will be moving away from the suburbs and into the city of Pretoria, and they will begin to focus on apprenticing South Africans. The apprenticeship will be slimmed down and stretched out over a longer period of time, as well as less curriculum-driven and more mission-driven.

Although these are changes that Daleen and I completely agree with, we don't feel called to make these changes with NieuCommunities. We sense that it is time to pass the mantle to new leadership that will guide NieuCommunities into its future. Therefore, at the end of this year we will be moving on from NieuCommunities into our future.

to change : to deepen


The past seven years have been highly formative for Daleen and me. Most importantly, we have deepened our intimacy with Christ. We have also grown in our leadership abilities and deepened our understanding of who God has created us to be. We see our true selves much more clearly.

In light of this, we sense that God is calling us into a new phase of life and mission. We feel that we are moving toward a more focused time of ministry that will utilize our 18 years of cross-cultural experience with CRM, as well as a clearer understanding of our personalities and gifting.

to change : to move


Daleen and I are both wired to mentor/coach others, helping men and women reclaim their hearts and all that God has for them. We also enjoy creative worship, unleashing creativity in ourselves and others, and encouraging creative expression. We want to help people better understand their spiritual formation in order to be transformed in their love relationship with Jesus. And we see ourselves using our hospitality gifts in an intentional community of people.


What we feel called to can happen pretty much anywhere in the world. Therefore, in order to help us better understand where God might be leading us, we are going through a Mid-Career Assessment at the CRM home office on December 9-10. We want to continue working with CRM, but we are not sure where we will be located. Daleen and I both sense that we will be leaving South Africa, which would most likely mean a move to America or Europe sometime next year.

to change : to pray

Please pray with us:

• for clear direction.
• for peace in moving away from South Africa. We have been amazed with how God is bringing peace to our children's hearts already. Daleen's dad is in ill-health and we know that it will be emotionally hard on her parents if we move away.
• for attacks of the enemy to be thwarted – we have been facing some pretty tough attacks lately. In this, we are focusing on who God is rather than on what the enemy is able to do.
• for needed financial resources – in light of the future, we need to raise about $1200 per month in new support - monthly, yearly and one-time gifts all help to provide for this need.

Much love and many thanks for partnering with us, Bryan, Daleen, Kyle and Zoe

Simplicity

If there was ever a practice that flies counter to our current culture, then it is simplicity. In the world in which we find ourselves, we often define the “good life” by how full, busy and complicated our lives are.

Simplicity is a word rich in meaning. Simplicity is a lifestyle. It is also a spiritual discipline. In her book, Spiritual Disciplines Handbook, Adele Ahlberg Calhoun writes, “Simplicity cultivates the great art of letting go. Simplicity aims at loosening inordinate attachment to owning and having. Simplicity brings freedom and with it generosity” (p 74). She also states that the desire behind the practice of Simplicity is “to uncomplicate and untangle my life so I can focus on what really matters.” Beautifully said.

Each year as part of NieuCommunities South Africa we try to live in the spirit of Simplicity. A couple of years ago, one of our staff members challenged our staff and apprentices to live for a month on half of our “disposable” income. That means once we have paid all our bills for the month we try to live on half of what is left over. So, for us our disposable income included all money spent on food, entertainment, petrol, school, etc.

Of course, Simplicity month is not only about money. As a matter of fact, it isn't primarily about money. It is about seeking first the kingdom of God and living in a way that is in sync with His kingdom. Therefore, we take time to examine our schedules, our relationships, our desires and addictions. I also make it a priority each year to limit the amount of time each week that I check the exchange rate and our financial giving report. These are areas where God is calling me to deepen my trust in Him.

We have done this for a couple of years now and I am amazed at what we can save in one month's time if we truly scrutinize how we are spending our money. Of course, the announcement of Simplicity month is usually met by groans too deep for words by our children, but by the end of the month I'm amazed at how well we've all adapted. We are more conscious of how much water we use, how many lights are on, or if we truly need to make a trip in the car or not.

The practice of simplicity is changing the way our family sees and engages the world around us. For some years now when Kyle and Zoe pray before a meal, they will always remember those who live on the streets and pray for their needs. When we, as a community, took part of the Simplicity money and bought blankets and bread for the homeless in our area, Kyle and Zoe pleaded to go along. They wanted to be a part of caring for others. They wanted to be a part of bringing God's kingdom in a tangible way to real people with real needs. That is the spirit of Simplicity.

“Simplicity creates margin and spaces and openness in our lives. It honors the resources of our small planet. It offers us the leisure of tasting the present moment.” - Adele Ahlberg Calhoun